Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Thank God for the Health Bar

thingsivelearned_healthbarVideo games are full of valuable life lessons that can solve many of the world’s problems. If you get shot – avoid the murder trial by hiding behind a crate for a few seconds. If you get in a fight – don’t worry about skill; you’ll be prompted when to fight back. Another great survival lesson that video games teach us: life bars and hit points make pain more manageable. Continue reading “Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Thank God for the Health Bar”

Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Who Needs Skill When You Have Good Timing?

thingsivelearned_qteOnce upon a time, in order to succeed at something it required time, dedication and skill development. Nowadays, we just need really okay timing. Continue reading “Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Who Needs Skill When You Have Good Timing?”

Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Money is Worthless

money in trash 2Money. It makes the world go round apparently. Though I can’t help but get the impression that it’s actually completely worthless at the same time. That or the people of Rapture and Columbia have so much that they don’t care what happens to it. Continue reading “Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Money is Worthless”

Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: White People CAN Jump

Uncharted
I can fly!

“Oh, man! I could totally get across this canyon if someone lowered that bridge on the other side…”, supporting character sighs.

“Don’t worry, bro. I got this,” our hero says as he takes a few steps backs in preparation for the great leap ahead of him. “Neal Armstrong ain’t got nothing on me.”

Our hero dashes towards the edge of the cliff and jumps in the air only to narrowly make it to the other side.

Continue reading “Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: White People CAN Jump”

Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Elevators Are Never Better

GoWElevator
Why can’t I just take the stairs?

Sure, let’s take the elevator. It’s faster, efficient and saves me some energy.

WRONG!

Continue reading “Things I’ve Learned from Video Games: Elevators Are Never Better”

Things I’ve Learned From Video Games: How to Stop Bleeding

20120105-175751.jpgI feel like this one is painstakingly obvious, in fact it’s certainly common knowledge to just do this now. I

don’t know why we bothered in the past with things like potions and medpacs, when all we really needed to do was to duck behind a box. All that time spent hoarding potions, tonics and medpacs of various shapes and sizes, we could’ve just been running for cover for 2-15 seconds and all our injuries would be fixed. No need to run around looking for boxes with red crosses on them before entering a giant room where we knew shit was goin’ down, just run in and hope there’s a box to hide behind, that’s all it takes.

Truly, planning and challenge are a thing of the past.